Love & Relationship Addiction

According to Pia Mellody, author of Facing Love Addiction, “a love addict is someone who is dependent on, enmeshed with, and compulsively focused on another.” The language used to describe a love addict is often interchangeable with “relationship addiction” or “serial monogamists”. The behavior that looks like the pursuit of love is a way to distract the love addict from anxiety, boredom or any distressing emotions. Whenever any uncomfortable feelings emerge, there is a compulsion to focus on a romantic relationship. The need for emotional intimacy will show up in the form of enabling immature behaviors or “rescuing” in hopes they will not be abandoned. The “rescuing” has an obsessive quality where the love addict will provide time, attention, neglect self to “the relationship”. This pattern of over caring for others results in anger and a limited experience of intimacy.

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